Always and Beyond
by knicnort3
Summary: Bella's life was in shambles until she took a chance and rediscovered a love that refused to die. Edward was a lost soul who was broken far beyond the limits of his body. When they find each other again, they must fight the corporal and ethereal worlds to find their true place together. *Loosely based on the movie "Just Like Heaven" *Alternate version of my story Always*No vampires
1. Chapter 1

***A/N:This is an _alternate_ version of my story **Always** for Chapter 41 and beyond. The reason I chose to separate it is because this goes a little farther into fantasy and it may be hard for some to accept/enjoy. I actually got this idea from a couple different reader's reviews, so thanks if you're one of the few who suggested it. I'm excited to explore this version and see where it goes. I'm not planning on there being very many chapters left, but we'll see.

If you've read the other version of Chapter 41, this starts out the exact same way but has a very different ending.

If you're new to this story, please read chapters 1-40 under my story 'Always'

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Chapter 41

After a perfect night of making love, the morning started out just as perfect. Bree was up before us and immediately started in on packing all her toys in her room, so Edward and I giggled and joined her. The three of us sat on the floor in her little room and did more playing then actual packing.

"So…when did this room get painted pink, wasn't it a dark gray or something?" I asked, just curious as to what he'd say.

"How'd you know that?" he asked surprised.

"Most of these bachelor pads in this complex are all grays and beiges," I played it off.

"Oh, yeah…well, it was gray, but someone came in and painted it when I was in the hospital. No one will own up to it, but I'm fairly certain it was the same person who took my cat."

"Aww, where is Fluffy anyway? We should take him to Seattle with us."

"Alice has him. I was supposed to get him back but I think she's grown a little attached; she keeps giving me excuses as to why she can't bring him."

"I think Fluffy should stay with Alice," Bree declared. "I want a puppy, and everyone knows dogs eat cats."

Edward glanced at me horrified. "Uh…apartments aren't great for dogs," he said in a panic. "How about a fish?"

Bree giggled. "Fish aren't cuddly. How about a snake?"

"How is a snake cuddly?" I asked her, a little disturbed.

"They give the best hugs," Bree said casually.

Edward and I just stared at her for a moment, and then he grabbed her and squeezed her tightly. "Who gives the best hugs?" he asked as he tickled her.

She laughed so hard I worried she'd throw up. "You do!"

"That's right, and don't you forget it."

A little while later, Alice arrived to take Bree to breakfast…

"Don't get her all sugared up," Edward warned as Alice was walking out of the door holding Bree's hand.

"Don't worry, I'll only let her have a little whip cream on her chocolate chip pancakes," Alice said with an innocent smile. "But there's no controlling that girl when it comes to syrup."

"I love syrup!" Bree said excitedly.

"Come on Alice, don't let her have too much, she'll never make it to City Hall later," Edward pleaded her.

"Okay, okay," Alice said while waving goodbye.

When Edward and I were alone, he looked at me and took a deep breath. "Well, you ready for this?"

"Of course," I said confidently.

He smiled at me and then wrapped his arms around my stomach from behind. "Wow, already got a little pooch there, huh?" he said teasingly.

"I do not!" I cried while rubbing my flat stomach - _or at least I thought it was flat_. "I'm just…bloated," I said defensively.

Edward smiled. "Aww baby, it's only a matter of time."

"When I am fat, you're not going to be so excited about it," I pouted.

"I'm beyond excited to see you fat," he said playfully while rubbing circles on my abdomen. "You have no idea how amazing it is for me to know you have my baby growing inside of you right now…It's surreal. I can't even believe it's really happening. Bree is the only person I've ever seen who has a genetic connection to me, and now this little guy…" he let his sentence trail off as he got choked up.

"Little _guy_? I thought you didn't believe Alice?" I said with a smile while trying to fight off my sudden bout of tears.

"I don't believe her, but it still has a fifty percent chance of being a boy…Besides, _'guy' _works for both sexes."

"Oh it does?" I said playfully sarcastic.

"Yeah, lots of people call groups of girls 'guys'."

"True," I said with a giggle. "Now let's go to the doctor to see how this little guy is doing."

It was strange how nervous I was for the appointment, but I suppose most people felt a little apprehensive about their first prenatal visit. Edward sensed my anxiety, and he reached out and grabbed my hand as he drove. "It's all going to be perfect, you'll see," he murmured supportively.

"Wow, now who's the optimistic one?" I said with a big smile.

"That's what we need to do, right?…When one is scared or worried about something, the other needs to step up."

I bit my lip and nodded. "Exactly. And we'll always do that for each other."

"For sure."

It was an amazing change to see Edward so confident, it was almost like seeing his ethereal self again, but the more excited and certain he was, the more nervous I became. What if the doctor found something wrong with the baby? How would we ever get past it?

"Doctor Kebi, thank you so much for squeezing me in," I said to the obstetrician once she entered the examination room. I was already in one of those horrible paper robes with my feet in stirrups, _which was a position that no one wanted to be in,_ and having Edward standing next to me strangely just made me that much more uneasy.

"I'm glad we could find the space for you," Dr. Kebi replied. "You've been my patient since you were sixteen, I was sad to have you move away to Phoenix."

"Yeah, well I was hoping you could now give me a recommendation for a doctor in Seattle now."

"Of course, but let's check you out first…So, when was your last period?"

"Uh…" _Shoot, when was my last period?_ "I've been pretty distracted lately…I'd say, five weeks ago."

"Well, we'll do a vaginal ultrasound to figure out exactly how far you are."

"Okay, great."

The ultrasound wand going into my body was more than a little uncomfortable, but having Edward snickering like a twelve year old in Sex Ed class only made it that much worse; he even mentioned the word "dildo" under his breath, and I seriously hoped the doctor didn't hear it.

"And there it is," Dr. Kebi announced, drawing Edward's and my complete attention to the little computer screen. I couldn't believe we were actually looking at our baby; it was incredible, and amazing, and every other word that described something magical. "There's the head, and the arm…It's definitely active."

She continued to talk, but I immediately found myself lost in the little blinking spot in the middle of the screen. Our baby's heartbeat. It was truly an astonishing thing. It was surreal, and yet it was the most real thing that ever happened. We were having a baby. _We were actually having a baby_.

I was so stuck in my awed haze that didn't notice her removing the stick thing from me, but after a few minutes she told me I could sit up and get dressed, so I figured we were just about done.

"Dr. Amun is great, and he's located on Main Street in Seattle."

I nodded. "Okay, thank you."

"I'll send over your files."

I nodded again and then wiped tears from my eyes before even knowing I was crying. But when I happened to glance over at Edward, he was obviously experiencing extremely different emotions.

"What's wrong?" I asked him slowly.

"She just said its twelve weeks," he said evenly.

"Oh, is that how far I am?" I asked without really thinking. And then it hit me, and everything abruptly changed. "Wait a minute…._Twelve_ weeks? How could I be twelve weeks?"

"That's what the baby is measuring," Dr. Kebi replied casually. "It's a bit farther than what I was expecting, but everything is fine so far, we just need to make sure you're getting all your vitamins and you're eating healthily…"

I took a deep breath, and then I exploded. "I can't be twelve weeks!" I yelled at her, hoping she'd shut the hell up and stop with the nonsense. "I just had my period like a month ago. I may have been a little distracted lately, but I sure as hell didn't miss _three_ periods."

"Spotting is normal in the first trimester," she tried to calm me.

"No!" I said quickly before looking at Edward. "She's making a mistake, this isn't right."

"Bella, she didn't measure it wrong," Edward said quietly…before getting up and walking out of the room.

My breathing hiked and my chest constricted, and all I could think of was chasing after him and somehow making him believe me. I dressed quicker than I ever thought possible, and then I rushed out to find him. I had no idea where he would have gone after a bombshell like that, but I was scared to death of what it was doing to his mental state. Thankfully I spotted him right away – he was sitting on a bench by the parking lot, with his head dropped in his hands.

"Edward, she's wrong; I'm going to get a second opinion."

"She's not wrong Bella!" Edward shouted at me unexpectedly. "I saw the sonogram. I know enough to know she wasn't wrong. You're twelve weeks…And the fact remains, twelve weeks ago I was in a coma."

I shook my head absently. "Maybe…Maybe it wasn't actually my ultrasound, maybe the wires were crossed with someone in the next room…" – _Okay, so it was a long shot, but I was desperate and my brain wasn't functioning correctly_.

He stared at me, shocked by my stupidity, and then he subtly shook his head no.

I sighed. "Edward, look, I have no idea what happened in there, but I know I can't be twelve weeks. I wasn't with anyone anywhere close to then."

"Well, conception dates can be miscalculated...but the earliest you and I were together is seven weeks ago, and there is no way she's that far off. A twelve week fetus is completely different than a seven week one."

"I wasn't with anyone else," I repeated.

"What about your ex-boyfriend?" he asked, seemingly out of nowhere.

"We broke up five months ago, and we hadn't been physical for months before that."

"Well…what about when he came here to see you?"

I scrunched my face. "What are you talking about?"

"He was here when I was in a coma; you must have gotten pregnant then."

"How did you know he was here?" I asked baffled.

"Your mom told me," he said slowly. "I called her the other night because I had no idea what your address was in Seattle. In the two minutes I was on the phone with her she told me all about how upset you were when I was in the hospital and that not even your boyfriend visiting made you feel better."

I hardly even remembered he came, but Mike's momentary presence in Forks certainly didn't get me pregnant. "We didn't have sex. We went to dinner, and then he fell in love with our waitress. That was the end of it. Edward, I'm not lying. I wouldn't do that to you. I swear, I haven't been with anyone else in a long time."

Edward scratched his hand roughly through his hair, and then pulled it up away from his scalp while squeezing his eyelids shut as if he was trying to stick them together permanently. "I'm not calling you a liar… If you say you didn't sleep with your ex when he was here, then I believe you…But we can't ignore the facts. You're twelve weeks, so that makes it impossible for it to be mine."

"So….you believe me, but the facts say otherwise. What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"I don't know…You worked at the diner around then, right?…Sometimes late at night? What if someone slipped you something…"

"No…Edward, I would know something like that," I said frustrated.

"Maybe you wouldn't."

"I haven't been with anyone but you!" I said angrily with hot tears streaming down my face. I wasn't mad at Edward, I understood what he was saying, but I knew with everything inside of me that he was the father, and I was so beyond upset that fate could be so cruel to mess with us like that. I didn't understand what was going on, but I refused to give in to it.

Edward clinched his jaw, and for a moment it looked like he stopped breathing, but then he huffed. "So…what then? You weren't with anyone else, but you weren't with me, so how did you get pregnant? Immaculate Conception?"

I gasped as his words threw me so far back that I nearly fell over from their impact. It wasn't possible. It was so far-fetched that my mind refused to even consider it…but my heart was already convinced. I was no Virgin Mary, but perhaps something otherworldly was responsible for my pregnancy.

But how was I going to make Edward understand if I couldn't even comprehend it myself? "Y-You…have to l-l-let me explain," I said with a shaky voice, in fact my entire body was trembling.

"Bella look, I just need a little time to process all of this," he cut me off, suddenly sounding broken and lost. "I need to clear my head." He reached in his pocket and pulled out his keys, and then tossed them to me. I caught them reflexively, but had no intentions of taking the car anywhere. I just stood there paralyzed as I watched him turn away from me and walk away...

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*****A/N: So I figured, if a vampire can impregnate Bella, then why not a spirit? LOL. Anyone interested in this version, please let me know.**


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 42

When Edward disappeared down the road, for whatever reason, I automatically began walking in that same direction. My mind was blank and I couldn't even really feel my body at that point, but I kept moving regardless. After walking for a bit however, Edward was nowhere in sight and I wasn't even sure where I was.

I looked around at my unfamiliar surroundings, and just didn't even care that I was lost. What difference did it make anyway? Edward thought I was carrying someone else's baby and I had no way to prove otherwise…how the hell were we supposed to move past that?

I had no idea how long I walked around aimlessly for, but eventually I came across a little bench to sit on, and I realized I had found my way to a park…The fact that it was the same park that we had eaten ice cream together in would have probably convinced me fate was still at work, but at that moment I just wasn't thinking about anything…anything good at least.

What if Edward was right? What if someone slipped me something at the diner and then raped me in the back. Would I have even known? Could I really be carrying some sick bastard's child? It was really the only thing that made realistic sense. Hell, I was so confused around that time, perhaps I really was just crazy and completely imagined Edward's ethereal existence; perhaps I slept with Mike and didn't even remember it because of my delusions. I shuddered at the thought.

I never wanted to have a baby. Only when I thought Edward was going to die did I even toy with the idea that it was something I may have wanted one day, but I certainly didn't want to have someone else's baby. It actually made me sick to think about , and I didn't know what to do. It was so overwhelming that I dropped my head into my hands, and just started sobbing. I cried so hard that several people passing by stopped to ask if I was okay. I didn't respond to them. I wasn't capable of responding, so eventually they all just continued on their way and left me alone.

After I cried it all out and my tears dried up, I just continued to sit on that bench feeling dead inside…and as if things couldn't possibly get worse, then it started raining. But the rain was a good thing, it made everyone around me disappear and I could finally have a little time to myself.

The sky grew dark and I assumed it was from the cloud cover, but something made me look down at my watch and I realized that somehow the entire day had passed me by and it was approaching evening.

As much as I didn't want to go anywhere, I knew being out in the pouring rain all night wasn't an option, so I forced myself to stand up and I started walking back the way I assumed I came. The rain continued to beat down on me as I went, and it wasn't long before the road in front of me was completely shrouded in darkness. I could barely see where I was going, but suddenly the brightness of a car's headlights illuminated the road from behind me. I considered sticking my thumb out and asking whoever it was to take me wherever they were going, but I kept my arm firmly to my side.

But as the car approached me it slowed down anyway, which made my stomach twist. What if there really was some psycho stalking women? I thought about running, but then…

"Bella!"

I reflexively turned to the sound of my name, and I nearly broke down crying when I saw Edward jumping out of the car; _though, I wasn't sure if I was emotional from being grateful he was there, or from wishing he wasn't_.

"Oh Bella, thank god!" Edward shouted as he wrapped me in his arms. "Where the hell have you been? Come on, let's get you inside." He pulled me into his car and then grabbed a blanket from the backseat to drape around me. "You're soaked."

"What are yyyou doing he-here?" I trembled, not realizing until right then how cold I actually was.

"What am I doing here? What are _you_ doing here? I've been looking for you all day."

"You have? But you left."

"I just needed to go for a walk to sort out everything in my brain. After about an hour I called Jasper to come pick me up, but you weren't at home so I went to your mom's and everywhere else I could think of trying to find you. When I went back to the hospital to see if anyone there knew where you were, someone said you dropped the keys and then just took off walking."

"I dropped the keys? Sorry about that," I said absently.

"Where have you been?" he asked again.

"Just…around."

"You've been walking around this whole time? It's been raining."

"I didn't know what else to do. Everything I thought I knew…isn't real anymore. I don't know where to go next."

"What are you talking about?" he asked sincerely baffled. "Nothing has changed. We're still going to get married and live our lives in Seattle. You promised me we were going to stay together, remember?"

I looked at him incredulously, and then vaguely wondered if he was playing some cruel joke on me. "I don't understand."

"What is there to understand? I love you. I want to marry you, and nothing is going to change that."

"But the baby…"

"It doesn't matter," he cut me off. "I mean, it does…having a baby together would have been amazing and I'm disappointed…but it doesn't really change anything. You got pregnant before we were together, so I have no right to be mad. Besides, we can have kids together in a couple years."

"So…You're okay with raising a baby that's not yours?" I asked slowly. I still wasn't sure how I got pregnant, but I was just trying to understand exactly what he was saying.

"We're raising Bree, and she's neither of ours. I know I can love a child that's not mine, especially if that child comes from _you_…But…I also know what it's like to not know where I come from, and I wouldn't wish that on anyone."

"What do you mean?" I asked confused.

"I've been thinking about this most of the day…My biological father has no idea that I even exist. He was probably some guy who did a shitty thing by screwing a drug addict, but for all I know he was a stand-up guy every other day of the year. Maybe he has a family with other kids. Maybe he would have wanted to take responsibility for me if he knew…I'll never know and that really sucks, so if this baby has a chance of knowing where it came from, I think you should tell it."

"But I don't know," I whispered with new tears rolling down my cheeks. "I swear, I don't remember being with anyone anywhere close to twelve weeks ago."

"Look, Carlisle and Renee can be…morons, but they both said you were acting a little irrational around that time. And that _is_ when your ex visited, so…maybe you should just call him and ask if you slept together. If he is the father, he really should know."

"When did you talk to Renee and Carlisle about this?" I asked getting even more upset

"I didn't. They both mentioned it earlier. Renee told me about the guy over the phone when I called to ask your address, and Carlisle mentioned something last week about you acting off."

"What did he say?"

"He said almost the same thing Renee did…That you didn't handle my accident very well. He mentioned you went to his house a couple times, and how you were talking about me being a ghost, or something like that."

I stared at him for a moment, and suddenly something snapped in my brain and everything became clear. Talking to Mike would be pointless, I never slept with him, and I was never slipped anything and raped without knowing it. In fact, those scenarios seemed ridiculous now that I was thinking right. I didn't give a shit about what was and wasn't possible. I didn't know how, I didn't know why, but I was once again beyond certain that Edward was the father of my baby.

The world was full of incredible unexplainable things, and even though I couldn't really make sense of what happened myself, I knew I had to find a way to make Edward believe. I needed to make him remember, and that would be all the proof he'd need….


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 43

Edward took me home to his apartment, and immediately walked to the master bathroom. "I'm running you a bath," he called back to me.

I was never really a bath person, but I was cold and uncomfortable from the rain so a warm bath actually sounded like heaven.

"Where's Bree?" I asked as I began peeling off my damp layers of clothes.

"She's going to stay with Alice tonight. In fact, I better text Jasper to let him know I found you so he can stop looking."

"Jasper is looking for me too?" I asked surprised and embarrassed.

"Uh yeah…and Emmett."

"Emmett? He didn't seem too enthusiastic about us when we saw him at Carlisle's."

"Well, that's because he didn't know that I was clueless about that memorial reception thingy. He just thought I screwed up and bailed. Once I told him what really happened, he apologized for being a fucktard."

"Oh…that's good," I said, unsure how else to respond. When I was undressed and waiting for the bath to finish filling, I happened to catch a glimpse of my naked torso, and was shocked that I did in fact have a little pooch there.

Edward turned off the water, and when he looked at me through the mirror his face fell the teeniest amount, but he tried to play it off. "I'm going to go make something to eat," he said quickly.

"You're not going to come in with me?" I asked disappointed.

"You need to eat just as much as you need to warm up," he said with one foot already out of the door. "I'll have something waiting for you whenever you're ready."

So I sat in the bath alone, and tried to come up with some sort of plan on how to convince him of the truth. I knew Edward loved me, and even if the baby wasn't his, eventually he'd grow to love the baby as well, but the awkward look he had just given me was heartbreaking, and I had a feeling it was only going to get worse the bigger my stomach got. I needed to find a way to convince him of the truth, and I needed to do it soon. Edward deserved the right to bond with his unborn baby, and it wasn't going to happen in the right way unless he knew.

But then I was suddenly struck with a horrifying thought that made me so anxious that it couldn't wait, so I immediately jumped out of the bath and wrapped myself in a towel so I could go find my cell phone.

"Hey…that was quick," Edward said as I rushed past him.

"I need to make a call," I explained without stopping. Once I found my phone I took it to Edward's bedroom and locked the door so he couldn't come in, and then I called the one person who might have an answer for my conundrum.

"Well if it isn't Julia Roberts," Alice said the moment she came on the line.

"Huh?" I asked bewildered.

"Julia Roberts…_Runaway Bride_…you ran away…Just, never mind. How are you? You had us all worried. Edward didn't tell us what happened, he just said you took off somewhere on foot and he couldn't find you."

"Yeah, I had some thinking to do," I said vaguely. "Listen, I really need to talk to you about something."

"Alright, shoot."

"Okay." I took a deep breath. "Have you ever heard of a ghost…getting someone pregnant?"

There was silence, and then laughter.

"Really, you've never heard of it?" I asked disheartened.

"Of course I've heard of it, but it's not real," she said through her giggles. "How could a ghost ever get someone pregnant?"

"Oh…right, but…what if they could?" I pressed. "I mean, if they could…you know…If they could have sex with a person, then why couldn't they get them pregnant?"

"Uh...How about the fact that they don't have a body," she said like a smartass. "Bella, remember when I told you to ask Spirit Edward about his tattoos?"

"Yeah, so?"

"Even though you could see Edward, feel him even, you couldn't see the tattoos because they were part of his physical body. You may have had sex with him as a ghost, but really, the fact that you could feel him at all was solely derived from your mind. You believed you could feel him, so you could…But people certainly can't conjure up living sperm…Why are you asking anyway?"

"I'm just curious," I said dismissively, and then I remembered something. "Didn't you say that the reason I was able to see and feel Edward was because he was my soul mate?…You said certain things could overcome the boundaries of life and death, and that was what Edward and I had. That is what you said, right?"

"Yeah…something like that. It's not an exact science since no one has done any definitive studies on the subject. Why, what's going on?"

"I'm pregnant," I blurted out.

"Yeah, I know, I read your aura, remember?" she said slowly.

"Well we found out today that I'm_ twelve _weeks."

"Oh…_Oh_. So that means Edward was in a coma when it was conceived."

"Exactly, and I'm ninety nine point nine nine nine percent positive that it's still his baby." Before she could respond I needed to ask my real question, so I took another deep breath and then just ran with it. "Alice, I guess what I'm asking is that since this baby is still his, regardless of him not actually being able to physically conceive it, what does that mean for the baby's DNA. Like if we were to do a test, would it even have his DNA if DNA is a physical thing? Do you understand what I mean? I just don't quite understand how it all works, and I need help."

There was another bout of silence from her part, which was a pretty big deal since Alice was rarely speechless about anything. Thankfully it didn't take too long for her to find her voice again.

"Uh...So...you…and him…and you think…Wow."

_Okay so it wasn't the exact response I was looking for, but it was better than her being mute. _

"Alice, you have to believe me on this," I said desperately. "You're the only one who would, and I have no idea who to turn to if you don't."

"Okay. I believe you. I don't know how I believe it, but I do….And you're sure that you weren't with anyone else around that time?"

"Of course I'm sure. Like I said, I'm ninety nine point nine…"

"So what's the point zero zero one percent possibility that it's someone else's?" she cut me off.

"I don't know, that I was drugged by someone and remember nothing."

"Okay, maybe you should go with _that_."

"Alice!" I said frustrated. "You just said you believed me."

"I do believe you, but it just…I never heard of anything like it before. I mean, I can believe in some pretty unbelievable things, but…how could he have created life, when he didn't have one himself? Apart from you going to the hospital, and somehow getting his sperm from his comatose body, I just don't see how it could be possibly his if you're twelve weeks along."

I sighed in defeat. My personal belief on the matter didn't falter, but if I couldn't even convince Alice, then how the hell would I ever convince a skeptic like Edward? At least with her support perhaps he would have been slightly willing to listen, but without her it was hopeless.

"Hey look, I'll do some research and ask around about this, okay?" Alice said gently.

"Thanks," I replied somberly, before saying goodbye and hanging up the phone. Without leaving Edward's room, I spotted his laptop and decided to take a little time to do some research of my own. I looked up anything and everything I could about spirits and human relations, and sadly didn't come up with much. There were legends of incubuses, but every single bit of information I found referred to them more as evil demons than spiritual soul mates. It was maddening, and it only made me feel that much more befuddled.

My conscience kept calling out to me to have Edward just take a paternity test, but my fear was that since his body didn't actually create the baby, what if it didn't share his DNA? Then again, if a test couldn't prove Edward was the father, then we wouldn't be any worse off than we were currently.

My mind was in such a state of chaos as I tried to reason everything out, that I began to question my sanity again. Strangely enough however, the further I got down the rabbit hole, _so to speak_, the more everything started to feel right. I had no idea how I was going to work it all out, but I truly felt like I was taking the early steps onto the correct path I needed to take. I had to trust that somehow, someway, Edward would believe me, and everything would be set right. If the paternity test turned out to be inconclusive, then I'd just have to make him see the truth some other way.

"So…I was just doing some research on the internet, and there's a new _non-invasive_ paternity test that that can be performed prior to the baby being born," I told Edward shortly after hanging up with Alice. "It's just a blood test for me, so it's perfectly safe for the baby even at this stage."

He nodded absently. "I think it's a good idea."

"You do?" I asked surprised.

"Yeah…I think the sooner he knows everything, the better."

"He?"

"Mike, your ex," he clarified, but then he abruptly became anxious. "But I mean, there's no rush. We have the funeral in a couple days, and I'm sure it'll take a while to get an appointment anyway."

On the grand scale of things, we hadn't really spent much time together, but it was enough for me to feel like I knew him better than anyone, and in that moment, it was clear to me that he was on the verge of a freak out.

"Edward, everything is going to be fine," I told him soothingly. All of his previous anxiety attacks had been a result of his fear of losing me, so I wasn't quite sure what was causing it right then, but I felt the need to, once again, reassure him that I would never willingly leave him. "We're going to take care of the funeral, and then get married, and we'll just worry about everything else later. Okay"

He took a heavy sigh of relief, and then nodded. "That's a good plan." The tension that was radiating off of him broke almost immediately, so perhaps the stress was just caused by everything compiling at once. Laying it all out like that made it simpler, and having a course of action was always a good thing for anyone with an obsessive anxiety disorder.

"Hey…You and me, right?" I said to him, just to reaffirm my feelings and how serious I was.

"Always," he replied.

"Then why are you questioning it again?"

"I'm not," he said with a heavy breath. "It's just…I don't know. Mike deserves to know, but at the same time…I hate the thought of it."

"The thought of Mike taking the test?" I questioned.

"The thought of sharing you. You're going to have all these…bonding experiences with him and the baby, and where the hell does that leave me? You made a baby with him; it's a big deal, and once you realize it, you're going to feel all kinds of things that you can't even imagine right now."

I really was shocked by his comment. On one hand I was beyond impressed that he seemed to open up about his feelings so easily, but the fact that he believed I was pregnant with someone else's baby, and yet he still feared I'd leave _him_ was gut-wrenching.

"Okay, first of all, I know I keep saying this, but I'll continue to say it for the rest of my life if I have to. I love you. I've always loved just _you_, and that will never change. And second of all, when I said I wanted to get a paternity test, it wasn't Mike I wanted to test."

"So…you remembered someone else it could possibly be?"

"I am one hundred percent positive Mike's not the father. We were never alone when he was in town, and the only time we were together, he was falling in love with the waitress."

"So who?"

"You," I said boldly. "I want to get you tested because I'm sure this baby is yours."

"Bella…you're twelve weeks," he said slowly.

"And twelve weeks ago we were pretty heavy into a physical-spiritual relationship."

"I was in a coma," he said evenly. "And before that I hadn't seen you in a decade."

"We met in an elevator."

"We met when our parents introduced us and said we were all going to be a family," he corrected me.

"Yes, but we met again after a decade apart in an elevator at the hospital. I was there delivering Carlisle lunch from the diner, and you appeared to be just leaving. You didn't remember me at first, but I understand now that it was because you didn't really remember much at that moment. Once you realized who I was, you were very persistent. It was like you immediately knew we belonged together, and despite my hesitations, you wouldn't stop until I admitted just how much I always loved you. I didn't find out about your coma until awhile afterwards."

He stared at me dumbfounded for a minute, and then he blinked a few times. "I...I don't understand…So, you're saying that while I was in a coma…." He let his sentence trail off because he obviously wasn't sure what he was even trying to say.

"We were together…while you were in a coma, yes."

"Okay, Bella, that's not possible. Carlisle was at the hospital every day. He would have known if I regained consciousness and left the room."

"Your body never left…but your spirit did."

"My spirit?" he asked incredulously. "Okay, you know what, I think we've both had a really long day. We should get to bed, and we can talk more about this in the morning when we're thinking clearer."

"Edward, I know it sounds crazy, impossible even, but it did happen. Bree saw you, Alice talked to you; the three of us all experienced your time out of body, and if you just try to have an open mind about it…"

"Ok, just stop," he snapped at me. "Bree is a little girl with serious emotional problems, Alice is just as unstable, and somehow they've convinced you that this is real. I mean, come on Bella, this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. You're talking Immaculate Conception here. It's preposterous."

"I know it seems that way, and trust me, I thought I was going crazy for a while too, but…"

"Yeah, well maybe you _are_ going crazy," he said harshly. "We've all been so focused on my mental issues, but you experienced the same thing I did, so maybe you're just as fucked up as I am but it's just surfacing in this absurd way."

"That's not what his is," I said quietly.

"No? How do you know? The truth is, the crazy never think they're crazy at first. It takes time to own up to something like that."

"I'm not crazy. I don't know how, but I will find a way to convince you," I told him with as much conviction as I could muster. "If you'd just take a paternity test."

"I'm not taking a fucking test!" he shouted at me.

"Why?" I asked exasperated. "It could prove…"

"All it would prove is that we're both so much more insane than anyone ever imagined." He took a moment to calm himself, and then he looked intensely into my eyes. "Having a DNA test done on _your_ baby is your choice, but leave me out of it."

And with that, he turned off the lights and walked back to the bedroom, leaving me standing there alone in the dark. My entire body was tense with anger, but Edward's pigheadedness was not unexpected and it would not detour me. Ethereal Edward didn't give up on me, and I'd never give up on him. I would find a way, I had to keep believing that.


	4. Chapter 4

Chapter 44

Things were tough for the next few days. Edward and I didn't speak about the DNA test again; in fact, we didn't speak about my pregnancy at all. There was a lot of tension between us, but we forced ourselves to put on a united front for Bree's sake, and together, somehow we managed to get her through her mother's funeral. Edward's family briefly asked about my pregnancy after the service, but since Edward was still pissed at them, they weren't that surprised when he refused to answer. I had no idea when or if he planned on telling anyone about the paternity issues with the baby, but I suppose that was his decision to make. I honestly didn't care what anyone else thought about it, I just had to keep hoping something would force Edward to wake up and believe the truth.

"Ready for this?" I overheard Edward asking Bree. With the funeral complete, there was nothing left keeping us in Forks so it was time to move to Seattle.

"I'm excited….but do you think I'll make friends at my new school?" Bree asked nervously.

"Of course you will," Edward said assuredly. "The kids in Seattle would be nuts if they didn't want to play with you."

"My mommy just said the same thing," Bree said happily.

"O-kay," Edward said uncomfortably. "Grab your doll and let's get going."

"Is that everything?" I asked as Edward walked out of the back hall carrying a box. Bree skipped along behind him with two stuffed animals and a doll in her arms.

"Yep. And we really need to get going to beat the traffic. Are you going into work today?" he asked me.

"No, and I'll probably only go in for an hour or so tomorrow. My team is actually really good and I don't have to worry much about anything."

"Bella, can I come to work with you at the bookstore sometime?" Bree asked eagerly.

"Sure thing. On one of your days off school you can come help me stock shelves."

"Really? Will I even get money?"

I laughed. "Definitely, but we'll have to discuss your wages later."

Because we were pulling a moving trailer the trip took longer than expected, and with Bree sleeping most of the way, Edward and I were left in an extended amount of uncomfortable silence. Every once in a while one of us would force a casual conversation, but it was strained and a small part of me wondered if he was regretting the move altogether. I knew he loved me and always would, but that didn't mean he was still certain about us. Perhaps he felt a little trapped; Bree and I already had a bond and I was sure he wouldn't want to disrupt that so soon after her mother's death…but it made me sad to think he possibly didn't want it anymore himself.

"You know, the apartment is three bedrooms, so…if you want, you can stay in the spare," I said hesitantly as we were pulling into my apartment complex parking lot.

Edward turned his head and shot me an unreadable expression, before looking back through the windshield to properly park the car. Of course, that was when Bree woke up, so he didn't have a chance to respond further.

"Can I unlock the door?" Bree asked while jumping out of the car and bouncing around the lawn area.

"Sure, here you go," I said while handing her the keys.

"Bree, do you remember which apartment it is?" Edward asked her.

"Yep," she said confidently, but when she started heading in the wrong directions she paused. "Well, maybe not."

We spent the next few hours unloading and unpacking Edward and Bree's things. Her room was already empty so it was fairly easy to find a place for everything, but because my stuff was already everywhere else, incorporating Edward's things was a bit more difficult. We took out most of my old ratty living room furniture and replaced it with his nicer stuff, but when he unloaded his bedroom set into the guest room my heart sank and I regretted the offer to let him use the room immediately. I didn't want him sleeping down the hall, I wanted him next to me like we had been sleeping at his place – _sure, we laid as far apart on the bed as possible, but we were still together._

It had been another extremely long day so we put Bree to bed early, and then I realized just how tired I was, so I went to bed as well. Edward stayed up and watched TV for a bit, but it only upset me even more because I knew I wouldn't be seeing him again until morning. However, a couple hours later, I was shocked and beyond relieved when I felt Edward climbing into my bed beside me. He didn't say anything, or cuddle up to me like I would have liked, but he was there, and that was more than enough for the time being.

We took the next several days to get settled into our new routine. Bree started school, Edward started his new job, and I had to get back into the swing of things at the bookstore. It was an adjustment for both Edward and me to get used to managing our time to get Bree ready every morning, and there were a few days when we were all late. More often than not Bree and I wore matching messy ponytails because I ran out of time to do anything better, we didn't always do her homework correctly, and sometimes fast food was all we could handle - but the three of us were figuring it out, and at the end of the day, we were becoming a real family, and that was a beautiful thing.

As great as it felt to be together, we still had some major issues. Edward and I continued to not talk about the baby, but we also didn't talk about getting married either. It was like we were stuck in some limbo that was ten times more paralyzing then the real limbo Ethereal Edward had been stuck in.

We just couldn't seem to move forward, but at the same time, we were holding onto each other with every last ounce of strength we were capable of. The less romantic we were together, the more anxious Edward seemed to get when we were apart. He began texting me again throughout the day, and when we were home he'd often hover and even absently follow me around the apartment whenever I'd leave the room. If I was in the kitchen, he was sitting at the table, if I was in the master bathroom, he was lying on the bed waiting for me to get out. It wasn't a possessive thing, it was his anxiety and insecurities threatening to overtake him again; we both knew it, but were too afraid to disrupt the family unit we had created by acknowledging it.

Something had to change, but whatever that something was had to be done carefully, and above everything else, we had to stay together to do it.


End file.
